Wednesday, October 29, 2014
Does Getting Angry Helps?
Does Getting Angry Helps?
I have always considered myself as a patient man. Someone who is seldom if never seen to be angry. One of the proudest boasts of my dear mum – especially when we go bride hunting/girl seeing- is that she has never seen her son, never ever, get angry. Which is true to an extent (only)- I am pretty slow to get angry (a very, very slow burning fuse) and even if I do get irritated its almost always strictly under control- I never express my anger in an ungainly manner, or throw temper tantrums or use the anger as an excuse to throw harsh words at others as a way to get things done my way. I mean, I get the concept of what the heck does this moment matter in the big picture of life without waiting to count the mandatory 1 to 10 recommended as anger-control measure. But lately I find that this is turning out to be a pretty big disadvantage in my day to day life.
Those who are considered short tempered people, those who throw temper tantrums and other things at people's heads when provoked get more things done easily than reasonable ones like me who try to deal with issues in a more nuanced manner. After watching numerous colleagues get things done more easily by raising their voices and throwing a temper tantrum at the drop of a hat, I am tempted to indulge in one too. Especially given the feedback I get from people when I ask why I am not served but made to wait while the angry ones get precedence and the matter of fact explanation I am given is that “sir you are an understanding person and will wait but he/she is a very angry person and hence we want to get rid of them fast by doing their work first”. Which shows that being calm has now turned into a very big disadvantage as it ensures your work keeps getting postponed indefinitely while the angry ones get served immediately.
And I am reminded of the old Indian folk saying of the “the child which does not cry does not get fed” and am sorely tempted to do something completely unexpected of me next time I want things done- raise my voice, throw things or shout hysterically and rant and rave. But the problem is how to stimulate anger when I don’t feel it really? Can I be that good an actor? Remains to be seen...watch out for more news on this page.
P.S. On reflection, do I really want to join the gang of the foaming at the mouth brigade? Can’t I be a calm and reasonable person and still get things done on time? Does our society really want to oblige only the beasts who lose their temper rather than serve reasonable and calm persons? Is this my fault or society’s fault? Do you have any suggestions or views on this, gentle reader?